Depression Manifesting Itself Physically: Starvation Feels Like Dying Because It Is, Duh

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^That’s me. That’s Drem.

 

 

∇ Hit play and listen on low for ambiance. Then, read on for full affect.

Every time I make some progress, I just puke it up.

I can’t remember the last time I was able to keep food down.

I’m going through my prescription sublingual anti-neasua medication like tic-tacs.

The mj doesn’t even help it anymore.

I’m too weak to get out of bed today.

 

I tried gatorade and a bread stick this morning.

Didn’t work out well.

I lost a bit more weight. Not much. My body is in starvation mode.

 

Some stupid fuck said it was because my psyche was “cleansing itself”.

I went to a psychotherapist and he said that that was complete bullshit.

More than likely I’m either getting this from medication, withdrawal from a medication, or depression.

I’m leaning towards depression.

 

 

Not being able to eat is one of the worst if not the worst physical things I’ve ever experienced.

I am so weak and blurry eyed and dizzy.

My hair is falling out. Even my eyebrows.

My skin is a little fucked up.

I’m so tired.

I don’t feel like me. I haven’t in awhile.

Ups and downs.

Ups and downs.

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I’m very, very angry.

I snap.

I’m very, very sad.

I cry over nothing.

 

Every time I make some progress, I just puke it up.

The BRAT diet isn’t working.

My mother is driving me fucking crazy.

I’m listening to Conor Oberst to calm down.

I can’t read my own poetry.

I threw my drugs out of my drug drawer.

I unfriended a bunch of assholes on Facebook.

I suddenly hate my art collection.

I don’t want to go some family party cause they ain’t my family.

Nobody knows me.

My thoughts aren’t making any sense.

I fell down the steps.

And all of this is completely connected, if you think about it.

∧I think that might be a sort of poem.

 

xoxo

Drem

 

 

 

 


13 thoughts on “Depression Manifesting Itself Physically: Starvation Feels Like Dying Because It Is, Duh

  1. Could it be a simple stomach bug? Any illness makes me very emotional. Anxiety makes me puke. I suck on peppermint or take ginger pills and when all else fails trusty zofran! Depression makes my hair fall out too and i cry over everything. Im currently in a slump. I feel for you and hope you keep something down! Gingerale? Suck on pretzal? Not that tou asked for advice, sorry i got all motherly lets fix it on you

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Np!
      I was thinking that but it’s just not stopping. It began when I started a new antidepressant. Then, when I was off it, I was good for a few days and it came back. So that’s why they are thinking it’s withdrawal. But it sucks. I got my zofran, girl!!! I already cried 2x today and it’s not even noon 😛 haha
      The bubbles in the gingerle make me feel icky. And pretzels are my besties ❤

      ty ty xoxo
      don't apologize!

      Like

      1. and before i forget, i went on your site and the background made it hard to read the text. I’m on a mac with my brightness all the way up. maybe it’s my computer. just fyi.

        Liked by 1 person

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