Sleeping Alone, poem by Drem

Sleeping Alone, poem by Drem

June 26, 2016

 

“I don’t mind being lonely anymore.

I just mind sleeping alone.

I realize now while sitting here in silence

in front of my laptop

with the air on

in my tiny, rather empty, bedroom

how little I’ve valued time

and how much I hated it

all along as I went with life.

It’s pretty isolating

when you’re stuck in your own head

and outside is too quiet to be heard

over the very loud mean voice

that lives in you

and eats you up all the time.

Over and over.

Alone.

I’ve been too busy running.

From it-

time.

And to people

who can’t save me

and wouldn’t if they could

because if they did

it might get out

that they have compassion.

And I’ve been too busy hiding to or from

a self-induced purple fog

or a raining blue chemical imbalance

or a synthetically made prescription peach.

They cause unsteady feelings, land legs on water,

anxiety as I approach the manic episode

flying faster than those hover trains in Asia.

Going, going, going-

two feet too high to make it through the tunnel

but it’s too late to turn around

and I’ve been waiting for this subconsciously

because I’m sleeping alone and I don’t like it.

All I’m trying to say is, I guess,

I get why cuddle-buddies are a thing.

And why people like to hug each other now.

And why people are okay

living in a hookup culture.

It’s fine being lonely.

But sleeping alone… no.

It’s too much.

Nights are too scary.

And they are too cold.

And we are all getting too old.

We might even die in our sleep.

We’ll then die alone.”

(C) Drem 2016

http://www.ArtOfDrem.com

 

 

 


10 thoughts on “Sleeping Alone, poem by Drem

  1. I have just the opposite going on. In January, I married my ex husband but didn’t come out to Texas to live with him until three weeks ago. I’m not used to sleeping with someone, and so far, I don’t like it, but it’s my forever now, so I have to get used to it.

    I miss my body being my own.
    I miss my time being alone.
    I miss my…

    I found I’m not fond of cuddling, but maybe that’s because I’ve been depressed. Thanks for posting your heart! It touched mine and will help me appreciate not being alone (I hope).

    Like

    1. I had to get used to it, too. But then it got like, “if he’s not here, WHERE IS HE OMG IT’S 4AM HE MUST BE DEAD.”

      I love my alone time. I get claustrophobic in relationships. I don’t thin I’m the marrying type.

      good luck newly wed ❤ many blessings for the years to come!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Sorry, I didn’t quite mean to get all remorseful. It’s a good thing to have a poem get to you like that. I think it must be so much easier if you actually like people. This really was a fantastic read and genuinely touched me!

        Liked by 1 person

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