Drowning With My Ghost, a poem by Drem

In her last moments of reflection, the ghost of her past doesn’t look away as her tears fill up the space and she drowns. She hates herself. The girl she was hates the girl she is now.

Drowning With My Ghost, a poem by Drem

September 23, 2015

“Dripping down the back of my throat.

Sticky, icky.

It tastes bad.

He tastes bad.

All these forced memories.

My heart hurts so much that the faucet

turns itself on

by itself

and water starts dripping down

on my face

from my eyes.

I can’t hear myself cry.

Tape’s over my mouth

but I can feel it drip down

and I can see the tears form puddles

on the ground.

Sooner or later

it’s going to happen.

I’ll finally fill this room up.

I’ll finally drown.

But until then,

I feel them,

the dreams I

had back then.

And the ghost I was

haunts me.

She’s faded, looks different.


I know that

she is me

by her small hands,

her shitty self-esteem.

Me before it happened.

And she fucking hates me


And, I can’t blame her.

So much happened.

Choices and dangers

and no choices

and forces

that were beyond my


We still feel it’s my fault

and nobody knows

but her.

She sits back against the wall

parallel to me

with a judgmental gaze.

Her scars match mine

on our legs.

So pretty,

red against

our crystal clear porcelain skin.

They preoccupy my mind

as my eyes fill up this space

with water

and I begin to drown.

…She smiles

and doesn’t look away.”

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